Three Months Gone
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This is a photo of Clinton, NJ. My mom had a condo in this town for some years. I spent my sister's night before she got married night, together with her and our mom. I would stay in the condo with her and my sister and love us three women being together. I borrowed Mom's car to go at the crack of dawn to take photos. I also tried the multiple coffee shops they had in town. On the third day I told mom about this cute coffee shop in town, my treat, and I would drive us, so the next morning she had her bagel and coffee in the coffee shop and she was so happy.
This is my mom. She always had a bagel and coffee for breakfast and it took some doing, but I got her to have her coffee and bagel with me in the cutest coffee shop in Clinton. It also had the best coffee. She was very happy with her food and coffee and as she wandered the shop, I was so happy I got her to come out with me. We had the best time together and I bought her a bag of coffee to enjoy at home. She made a fuss about the money, but I got it anyway. I know she loved it because every time we would talk she would rave about the coffee she was drinking.
My mom was the strongest person I have ever known. Her second husband was not so nice to her or me. My mom pressed on being the happiest person. She was the friendliest person you could meet. In her Eulogy my sister and I wrote how she never knew a stranger, only friends she had not met. She used to wrap presents and have us kids run up and leave them on the porch and run back into the car. She made sure no one went without, even though she did not have a lot of money.
I learned after she passed away that even though money was tight, she gave to St. Jude's and now my sister and I do it in her honor. My mom was such a remarkable woman. We shared a room together in my grandparent's house till I was 9 years old. I know that was not ideal for her, but I am thankful for 9 years that she was all mine. My family means the world to me. My family in NJ and my family in Ga, I learned so much from my mom. How to keep my head up no matter what, to have faith in God, that he held me. She was a woman of faith. She grew up Catholic.
My mom sat and talked with me for hours. We sipped our coffee. We shared a bagel. I got to just be with her and enjoy her. For all the days, months, years I had with her I am forever grateful. Today is three months gone from this earth and my heart is still shattered. She was the only parent I ever had. She was my rock even when she could not stand on a firm foundation. She was blessed with two amazing parents, my grandparents, and my grandma watched me while my mom worked at RCA for years to support us.
If you are lucky enough to still have your mom, let me say, be with her, just sit and listen, ask about family, ask about her past, because before you she had a whole lifetime. She was on a parent float, she was working to support herself. She and my godmother always took us on vacation together yearly and I know they both saved all year to be able to take us lil ones on these trips. Enjoy your mom, spend time walking with her, talking with her. I do not regret one minute I ever spent with my mom. I never left anything unsaid and neither did she. We said what we had to say. I have no regrets about not saying something and now she is gone. I am thankful for every time I got to spend time with her. Having coffee in a shop in Clinton NJ is one of my all-time favorite memories of her.
May you be blessed with family for years to come.
Your friend,
Debbie
xoxoxo
PS hug your mom if you still can :)
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