Sunday Stories, Daily Living Edition
And then... the day begins. It is off the race to start, to get it all done, to clean everything I have made a mess out of for seven days, and to clean it up in one day. How does this even make sense?
But yet here I am, mop, broom, a bucket of pine sol, sprays for the kitchen counters, the microwave plate out to clean and to clean the inside of the microwave.
The rat race was brought on by society, but I am home alone. I feel their eyes of judgment on me. Look at that dust, they say. How is she even alive they say, as they see my yard needing to be mowed?
The rat race though is in my head. It is racing my blood pressure and it is causing me health issues, but out loud, no one has said anything to me. I perceive it from the looks I get from strangers. Strangers who do not matter to me and who may or may not be judging me.
My daily life Monday to Friday is work. Drive 30 miles to work, work, drive 30 miles home. While I love my job and feel real purpose in it, I have to wonder if I'm doing anyone any good by being on this hamster wheel of life. I drink the calm tea, I do the meditations, and I try to shut my mind off. I struggle with high Blood pressure and while on meds, keeping it down. But new neighbors moved into my neighborhood and they have more than me and I have lived here for 22 years. Once again I do this or that, him or me, the jones has it all and I am a failure. Except I am not. I am the only one working in this house, I pay my bills, I put gas in the car and food on the table.
Why is it I compare myself to others? I thought I was doing well until I look at others. We base how we are doing but the things we have. Well, I have the love of my two wonderful adult children. I have the respect of my coworkers and a reputation for being helpful to all I work with. I try to go above and beyond and help all who need it. I have the love of a husband. I have food in my fridge, I have a cat who hates to love me and loves to hate me hehehe he is special.
Daily living when looked at on a day-to-day basis is full of taking out the trash, mopping the floors, and cleaning the house, but when you look at it through a year looking back, there is some things you accomplished. The house stayed clean enough, laundry made it to the washer so you were never naked in public, and you have achieved bigger goals like publishing a book or any bigger thing like weaning a baby or potty training a toddler, or perhaps you got your dream job. Whatever it is, when we open the scope of our daily lives to include the bigger picture, yes we cleaned, but we did so much more.
I have gotten better about leaving my phone when I first wake up. It sits there and it can wait. I make the coffee, I drink it, I crochet, I read a book, I do my listening to the morning birds, watch the sun wake up, and then after an hour or so I will look at my phone. It has made all the difference. When I was getting on the phone I would lose time scrolling and reels and things I really did not care about. Now when I pick it up I check messages and email and put it back down. I have finished a lot more books this way.
I've been reading about slow living a lot. About Danish living and about hygge. I truly believe the United States is running on burnout. After seeing how some other countries do life, I really have to wonder about the USA. We rush from thing to thing. Our Calendars are packed with more than we can do and we are unhappy and running and rushing and life is truly passing us by. I wrote a piece on the art of doing nothing. ( look back through my writings) And I have been working to declutter my home and my life. I have been taking stuff to goodwill like a mad woman. Things I thought I needed but never actually use. I have made cups of tea and let them steep while I daydream out the kitchen window. I have worked at finding even 5 min in the morning and 5 at night to meditate. Life is more than the rushing, the paying bills, and the mundane we have to get through to have fun. My husband, I feel, judges me hard for always eating the cookie before the meal or the cheesecake before dinner. I remind him life is short and I play on enjoying it.
I am a grab life by the horns kind of gal, I love writing to you all. This is my safe space, and I hope yours. I love writing on Sundays to you all. It is part of my Sunday Daily Living. It is part of my weekly practice. Which equals to one post, which now equals to over 100 posts, which is nothing to sneeze at. I have written posts on here, medium, elephant journal, and Spillwords. I have written about many different topics, but right now I am working on intentional living my best life. I hope the mundane does not bog us down so much that we do not truly live our lives.
May this day be a blessing to us all,
your friend, Debbie
xoxoxoxoxoxoxo
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