Cool Spring Night

Greetings all,
to catch you up, ive lost my job,but im working on unemployment now. I can go to school fulltime tho now, so might be a blessing. I have cracked the 230pnds finally and weighing in at 228. Still doing the gym three days a week and yoga 2-3 days a week. Good lord I love yoga...who knew!!

Last night was a cool night. I slept with my bedrooom window open and the air felt so good. It brought me back to my childhood and my grandparents. I used to spend many a night at their house as I loved them more then life itself and them right back at me. And this popped into my head.... was a cool night. The air floated upon my body as if it was a feather tickling me. I rememeber this air. I welcomed it back. I always longed to be with them. I used to lay in my room with the window open and listening to some summer tunes. Back then we had 8 tracks playing and she always sang along. He always not judging me and loving me like Jesus does. No judgement no harsh words. They worked together as a team. Everyone once in awhile I'd hear a LOUIEEEEE!! and I knew he was in trouble. Glad it was't me. The night air,,floating,, coating me in love that I have missed for so many years. I remember them fondly. I rememeber them with love. The hole in my heart since they past is huge,but it also has so much love in it for them,,for my room they made for me, for the night air again last night. It hugged me again like it used to. It took me to a place I loved and felt safe.Something I havent in years. I think back and love all the night cool air and thankful it came last night to hug me again.

with that its been almost 17 yrs since my gpa past and about 13 since my gma. They were my support system,..they were my loves.. they were my rock and supporters and I miss that so much in my life and I hope one day that someone once again comes and fills my heart up with love .

a girls gotta dream right ;)

Happy Tuesaday to you all.

PS food for thought,,who in your life fills your heart with love? Share if you want with me ,if not just think about it and thank that person for loving you are you are.


  1. Your thoughts today brought me back to a time in my childhood when I spent so much time at your grandparent's house. I remember so well the sound of "Louieeeee". I had to laugh. As I read I visited their house once again. Strangely enough, I could remember every room with some degree of clarity.
    I also remembered when you were a baby and the way your grandfather carried you everywhere. I used to laugh and think to myself: this child will never learn to walk because her feet never tough the ground long enough for her to learn. By the way, your mother was just as bad. She held you all the time as well. In fact, I teased her and commented that you were the only child I ever saw that cried to be put down. You needed space!!
    Thanks for the trip down memory lane.

  2. thanks for sharing Judy. I still miss them so. I'm pretty sure now I just call my mom way to much and thank The Lord for her staying down here and beating cancer.


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