Marriage And The Lies We Were Told!

 

                                            Photo by Zoriana Stakhniv on Unsplash

 Marriage. Wedded Bliss. You found your forever after and you believe all your problems are solved. You found your spouse and now everything is coming up roses. Life will get easier, better, and happier by finding your spouse. We have all been fed a pack of lies. 

Married life now means you have someone living with you. Hopefully happy and in love with you, but know that life will not magically turn into a bed of roses. Marriage is work. It is a full-time job. It is not fifty-fifty.  Sometimes you will give 60, your spouse will give 40, and sometimes you can only muster 20. 

Life is hard at best, a struggle to survive it at its worst. There are days when you want to growl at your spouse and days you want to just hold them and kiss them and snuggle close. There are days when you both have struggled in the world and just need to order out and be ok with that.

Marriage is a give and take and sometimes you take more than you give and sometimes the opposite is true. Life is hard and marriage takes work as I recently discovered when you think you are doing everything right, you are possibly still doing everything wrong. What you think is right, is right for you, not right for your spouse. 

Sometimes the values you grew up with or the money your family had when you grew up are different. Sometimes one keeps the jar of mayo because there is enough for a sandwich while the other person throws it out. 

How we grew up compared to how our spouse grew up becomes a barrier to becoming closer. One person starts to resent the other person. One person says you have too many personal items in the house and the other person takes offence or the other way around. 

Marriage is not all kisses and hugs and life is perfectly sprinkled with fairy dust and there are no problems. The problems you come up against, you need to work together to get threw them. Instead of letting issues and problems come between you, try coming together as a team to tackle them.

Life is so very difficult these days. With covid, the flu, money, and jobs, it feels like we are living in chaos. If we let things in our marriage tear us apart we will end up getting divorced. If we come together to tackle whatever life throws at us, then we will be strong and be married for many years.

I know I was told marriage lies. I can only presume some of you were too. Know you are not alone and neither am I. People platitude marriage and that hurts us if we listen, but if you are blessed to know someone who has been married for years and has given you the secrets to a great marriage, well you are on your way to I hope a long and happy marriage. 

May your day be filled with love, light, and happiness. May your life be blessed with the love of your spouse and remember some days you bend and some your spouse does, but comprise is key in coming together to tackle anything life throws your way.

Happy March to you, may the Irish luck be ever on your side.

Your friend,

Debbie

xoxoxxo